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Author Topic: PROTECTING YOUR PRIVACY HERE (READ!)  (Read 2192 times)

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Offline Addie

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« on: November 17, 2015, 11:52:23 PM »
Unfortunately, some people do not understand the difference between fantasy and reality and may attempt to use information you post here to harm you. These can include delusional stalkers who believe all women here want to be raped in reality (they do not under any circumstances whatsoever!), and nosy neighbors who may use public ignorance about your kink to blackmail you.

Take these steps to protect your privacy here:

1) DO NOT cross-post pictures both in public spaces here and on public social media! Stalkers can use image-search engines to find the same picture cross-posted to your Facebook page, and from there they can get your real name, address, names of friends and business contacts, and other information they may use to locate or blackmail you. IF THIS EVER HAPPENS: Do not respond to or acknowledge the stalker and inadvertently verify that you are the same person! Stalking and blackmail are crimes, so contact the police, and keep the admins here and on your social media in the loop. To protect yourself best, make your personal info and pages here and on your social media visible only to friends/buddies. How to do that here:
  • Profile > Account Settings > Uncheck "Allow users to email me". Your email is private by default.
  • Profile > Modify Profile > Ultimate Profile > Check "Only buddies can view my Ultimate Profile" and "Show my pictures only to buddies and admins".
2) If you DO choose to share any pictures, even ones you think cannot identify you, STRIP ANY METADATA FROM THE PICS FIRST:,753.0.html

3) Secure your wireless routers (wifis) and home networks! If your wifi covers a relatively large territory that extends beyond your walls, a nosy neighbor can "hack" your wireless router using little more than the manufacturer's default username and password and gain access to the list of websites you have visited. A basic Internet search on your wireless router's manufacturer can find you the default username and password; make sure you change it to something new! Separately, if you have multiple computers on a home network (workgroup), make sure you change that default name and password too. A "hacker" who gains access to both your router and your network can do a lot of serious damage. If you find yourself being stalked, don't forget computer repairmen on your suspect lists.

4) Be extremely careful about sharing any information with other members which can identify you in real life! This includes real name, your real city, your line of work, pictures of yourself, etc. Any member who attempts to subtly coerce you into sharing such information may be a predator looking for ways to harm you. Though you may be thrilled by others finding you sexy, resist sharing too much until you know each other well.

A few true horror stories to drive these points home:
  • Victim #1 had an obsessed neighbor who gained unauthorized access to his wifi and home network and stole cookies off his computer which enabled her to get into the list of websites from his router as though she were him. She then threatened to blackmail him.
  • Victim #2 was a young woman who met an older man who thrilled her with his dominating personality and appeared to be well educated in BDSM and playing safely and respectfully. But when she met him in real life for a cautious BDSM session, he blew past all her boundaries and assaulted her. After she reported it to police, she found he had used the Internet to stalk and assault women before and was in fact a felon on parole; his computer use violated his parole and sent him back to jail. Unfortunately, it didn't save her first. (But her reporting the incident to police did put him back behind bars and may have saved other women the same fate!)
  • Victim #3 began receiving threatening messages from a stalker who quoted posts she made online, along with descriptions of her home that only someone who had been there could possibly know. When the police found him, he was a few miles away and armed with everything to make her rape a reality. How he found her: he had repaired her computer in the past and become obsessed with her.
  • Victim #4 trusted his online playmate with his name and where he was employed. She then attempted to blackmail him by threatening to expose his online kinks to his employer.
I can't stress enough that if your privacy is compromised, INVOLVE THE POLICE A.S.A.P.!  Let the police and prosecutors advise you on how to ensure you remain safe. We'd rather you be  embarrassed than dead! (Note, however, that in any blackmail/extortion case, what matters is only that the blackmailer tried to coerce you into doing something you didn't freely agree to by causing you distress, and you needn't address at all the truth of whatever they're threatening to expose. It's still a crime, and in some jurisdictions it's a civil matter as well.) Keep us in the loop so we can cooperate with the police in bringing criminals to justice.
« Last Edit: January 17, 2017, 04:58:58 PM by RayPistonprowl »


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