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Author Topic: When I Die and Go to Heaven  (Read 1606 times)

Offline phtlc

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When I Die and Go to Heaven
« on: February 25, 2015, 03:29:22 PM »
So the way I figure it, we all have something to do in heaven, a job if you will. I mean some may be obvious. For example, if you were a singer on earth you will be part of heavens choir, and if you were a chef you will work in the heavenly kitchen. I imagine that since it is heaven we all get to pick our job.

The job I want when I get there is Personal Assistant to Saint Peter. For those of you who don’t know, Saint Peter is the guy who stands at the gates of Heaven with a big log book of your life. He reads through the book and then rather like a roman emperor he decides whether you get into heaven for eternal bliss or go to hell to be tortured in a burning lake of fire, screaming in unendurable mind-bending agony for an eternity. I figure that has to be the ultimate bouncer’s job. I mean, you hold peoples eternity in your hands. Just the sense of ultimate power is delicious and I see all sorts of wonderful opportunities that can arise when Pete is not around. I mean he has to go to the bathroom like everyone else, and he must also take vacations, unless his union isn’t doing their job. That is where I will be guarding the gate unsupervised. Not only do I get to fuck around anyone I didn’t like, but more importantly all the hot looking chicks are going to have to earn their way past me. Regardless of how good they were I will nitpick through their life book for every little indiscretion and make a huge deal out of them, saying they are to be sent to eternal damnation. When they start crying and wailing in anguish at the verdict I can then say;


“Well sweetheart……..just what are you willing to do for me to save your eternal soul? ” .... :fuck: :bj: :anal: :spank:........ Shit I’m getting hard already.




To all you ladies start thinking real hard about how you will go about satisfying me. I already know what debaucheries your perverted little minds can conjure up so don’t expect that you can get past me just by putting out a little vanilla sex. Oh no…………you will redefine perverted debauchery with me when standing at the gate, and with your eternal soul at stake, don’t think you will have the balls to say no to me.

Oh yeah….definitely going to be his personal assistant. I just hope to fuck I die before Sofia Vergera

« Last Edit: February 25, 2015, 03:31:47 PM by phtlc »
Struggle and squirm all you want. That hymen is mine!

Offline Surrender2U

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Re: When I Die and Go to Heaven
« Reply #1 on: February 25, 2015, 03:57:53 PM »
I would bring you a timid virgin, and help hold her down when she starts to fight and scream. She will be young, thin, brown hair past her shoulders and look like Sofia Vergera. She'll be in a skirt and blouse for easy access. I'll teach her how to suck your cock since she's never had one before.

You're welcome!

Offline LEONIDOS

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Re: When I Die and Go to Heaven
« Reply #2 on: February 25, 2015, 07:59:38 PM »
eat heartie for tonight we dine in hell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Offline phtlc

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Re: When I Die and Go to Heaven
« Reply #3 on: February 26, 2015, 05:33:46 PM »
I would bring you a timid virgin, and help hold her down when she starts to fight and scream. She will be young, thin, brown hair past her shoulders and look like Sofia Vergera. She'll be in a skirt and blouse for easy access. I'll teach her how to suck your cock since she's never had one before.

You're welcome!


You are the best!!!!!!
Struggle and squirm all you want. That hymen is mine!

Offline Tragedy

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Re: When I Die and Go to Heaven
« Reply #4 on: March 03, 2015, 02:38:58 AM »
well, I assume according to your logic I'd be a Pastry Chef, since that's what I do here on earth. However if we get to choose...

I'd like a servants position, I would think. (speaking non sexually for a moment) I don't much like the spotlight, so no choir, I'd be happy cooking like I already do, but also maybe something else, assisting the angels, or Saints, maybe setting the table for the feasts every night and gathering flowers from the fields of lillies and wildflowers to help decorate, or playing with the little children that are there, keeping them company and helping them to watch over those they love on earth. At the end of my work, I'd walk through my own personal heaven, a forest that is always in autumn sunset, with leaves falling like snowdrifts, softly for me to walk on. I'd have my own little cabin instead of a mansion, something cozy, set against a backdrop of mountain, beside a creek that sparkles from the sunlight as if God himself threw diamonds along the surface to shine for me. I'd retreat there for the night and think of all the beauty and wonder I was blessed enough to see, and just be grateful that someone like me actually got in. If not that, then I would love nothing less than to sit at God's feet and ask him all the endless questions I could think of, and gather up his answers in my heart to save them, and think on them later.

To speak sexually, I'd still be a servant, but I'd like to think that I was a reward, rather than a punishment.
If there is beauty in the breaking then make me gorgeous.
I can make hell feel like home.

Offline GermanChick

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Re: When I Die and Go to Heaven
« Reply #5 on: March 15, 2015, 12:24:08 AM »
All I can say is




Blackmailed MILF...


Do I really need to go into more detail ?






xox




GC

Offline justmetoo

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Re: When I Die and Go to Heaven
« Reply #6 on: April 18, 2015, 06:56:22 PM »
Heaven?

I'm going straight to hell. I figure it will be more fun down there anyway.

Offline MamaMeadow

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Re: When I Die and Go to Heaven
« Reply #7 on: April 18, 2015, 11:34:49 PM »
Oh honey....Sofia Vergara is MY bitch :D
YOUR GOD INSIDE ME
MAKES ME YOUR WHORE

I didn't even need to boak but after seeing what she was doing plus smelling me own jobby I promptly boaked in the sink as well.
-Ray
Slowly with the aid of a couple blue pills, they drew their glans against us - Ingy
I'm as hard as a coral reef right now. - bjc1979

Offline Dark Desire

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Re: When I Die and Go to Heaven
« Reply #8 on: April 20, 2015, 11:15:03 PM »
As I don't believe in heaven or hell (other then when we get a taste of either of them here on earth) I guess my job would be to occupy a piece of the ground in one place or the other.

If one or the other does exist GC's blackmailed MILF sounds good, now to get the material on the MILF's (or the women in general) I want to blackmail...  :naughty: >:)
« Last Edit: April 20, 2015, 11:16:42 PM by Dark Desire »

Offline BiancaBlack

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Re: When I Die and Go to Heaven
« Reply #9 on: May 27, 2016, 09:12:11 PM »
That was hilarious

Offline wickedman

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Re: When I Die and Go to Heaven
« Reply #10 on: May 28, 2016, 11:40:57 AM »
When I die I wanna g :rofl: o to Texas.  LOL

 

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