I agree that a good Dom is a good person. But a good person doesn't always make a good Dom*. Someone with the best intentions, who doesn’t wholly understand the job, nor a woman’s anatomy (if he’s a sadist and plans to inflict pain, whether it’s a simple spanking, or some really hardcore shit) can really do some damage mentally, emotionally, and/or physically if they don't know what they're doing. A good Dom must appreciate and value the weight that comes with taking the control his sub offers him, be comfortable in that role, and know what to do with it! He must be sensitive to and read all of her verbal and nonverbal queues and idiosyncrasies. Let’s face it. There is a point in time when a sub may not be able to use her safe word... or words in general, and that’s where the wannabe “dom” may misstep and do some real damage. (SO MANY TANGENTS TO GO AT THIS POINT!! But I’ll stay on course.) The really good Doms know their subs even more than the subs know themselves. They are in tune with their wants and desires in the bedroom, the dungeon, and in life. They know when to push and when to pull back. They know what is best for their pet, and their goal is to not only make her happy, but help her realize her truest, best self... which may or may not include tears along the way.
*Yes, I know Doms can be male or female - surprisingly where I live, they are mostly female - but here I am using my thoughts based on my experiences, and therefore I am using the male version of Dom and female version of sub. No disrespect intended or implied sexism to the Dommes out there who may read this.