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Offline Surrender2U

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24/7 Control
« on: January 23, 2017, 03:25:30 PM »
I was just curious, who is interested in giving total 100% control over to the Dom/Domme/partner? What you eat, how you dress, what you do, etc.  I can imagine that in the beginning it takes a lot of effort for the Dom. But once the foundations are down then it would get easier. Or am I wrong? Do you envision a 1950's household?

Does anyone live this or is this appealing to anyone?


Offline Sara

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Re: 24/7 Control
« Reply #1 on: January 23, 2017, 05:16:07 PM »
I don't live it but would love to. Would also find it so embarrassing with other people around. Seeing me being a total slave to him, seeing me not making any choices. That would be so humiliating. Would drive me even more into his arms.

Offline RayPistonprowl

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Re: 24/7 Control
« Reply #2 on: January 23, 2017, 06:06:01 PM »
I've done the 24/7 thing with one slave, and that was enough for me. It required a LOT of work on my part, which was fun for a while, but ultimately it got tiring. You'd think you would establish routines that your slave would enjoy and the work would let up after a while, but that isn't true - you've got to keep changing it up to keep your slave entertained or she can begin resenting you or feeling unappreciated. I've got a family that demands my attention now so it may be I simply became incompatible with that sort of play.

Don't hurt him too much, especially his face. I want to use it as my throne at some point. -cosmicwitch
If I ever have a punk band with just two members, I'm calling it "Anal Pear". -kittyumbrass
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Offline Sara

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Re: 24/7 Control
« Reply #3 on: January 23, 2017, 06:07:31 PM »
LOL. Seems like the ultimate dream for a dominant man but turns into a tedious series of chores!

Offline BiancaBlack

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Re: 24/7 Control
« Reply #4 on: January 24, 2017, 12:40:59 AM »
Not in a million years!

I only submit in the bedroom :)

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Offline Sara

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Re: 24/7 Control
« Reply #5 on: January 24, 2017, 01:37:35 AM »
[member=1474]BiancaBlack[/member] You may want to play some simple games in public space such as handing your master your panties in a restaurant. Great fun!

Offline Alexander

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Re: 24/7 Control
« Reply #6 on: January 24, 2017, 06:49:25 AM »
I pretty much retired from this site to live a 24/7 life with a sub I met mid last year. It's become a 1950s style relationship in which she cleans my apartment once a week, does my washing and shopping and ensures my pantry is stocked. She has an account which I fund to enable her to do my shopping, collect my laundry and run errands as instructed.

In return, I encourage and facilitate her burning desire to live her life as a stay at home mom for her two children and be proud of her achievements. When I met her she was uncertain about how a Dominant would look upon someone who didn't earn a living for herself.

The D/s part of our relationship extends to rituals she has agreed to undertake daily at home and and in public. It also includes things like me choosing her food from a menu when we are out dining, supervising her household budget to the extent that she plans her spending and I am responsible for ensuring she sticks to it. We have also agreed to a weekly routine for her to keep her house tidy that includes the weekly tidying of my place also. (We do not live together).

The structure we have built around her is becoming more extensive and tighter as our relationship develops and is open for either of us to suggest and discuss new ways I can increase my control over her life (it was her who suggested me choosing her meals, for instance). She asks permission before doing certain things that lie within the boundaries of our contract and accepts my decisions though sometimes not willingly. (She is also a little and there is alwaays the risk of a tantrum or two!). She understands though that I make them with the best of intentions for her safety, personal development and needs.

This is a way we have chosen to live our lives and I need to point out it is in no way boring, tedious or procedural. She delights in an opportunity to serve someone who appreciates her efforts and thoughtfulness in ways which are reflected in a full BDSM relationship. It's not for everyone, clearly but for a couple who understand the dynamics where one lives and wishes to serve another in a relationship based on the fundamentals of open and honest communication and thought, it has proved to be a joy I never believed I would live to share.
« Last Edit: January 24, 2017, 06:54:22 AM by Alexander »
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Offline Surrender2U

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Re: 24/7 Control
« Reply #7 on: January 24, 2017, 09:09:13 AM »
Thank you for the replies.

I don't think I'd be able to do this unless I was madly in love with this person, and that is what he would want. I don't think it's something I would seek out. But it is very intriguing.  :-?

Offline RayPistonprowl

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Re: 24/7 Control
« Reply #8 on: January 24, 2017, 04:40:54 PM »
This is a way we have chosen to live our lives and I need to point out it is in no way boring, tedious or procedural. She delights in an opportunity to serve someone who appreciates her efforts and thoughtfulness in ways which are reflected in a full BDSM relationship. It's not for everyone, clearly but for a couple who understand the dynamics where one lives and wishes to serve another in a relationship based on the fundamentals of open and honest communication and thought, it has proved to be a joy I never believed I would live to share.

You've done it 6 months. I did it 7 years. We were plenty open and honest and communicated well, and I knew to expect little tantrums - that isn't what put me off. What EVENTUALLY put me off was the constant need for attention and supervision, which any parent knows can be tiring. When you begin to need a break from your slave, something is wrong! She didn't work and had all the time in the world to resent me for all the time I couldn't be there, and that eventually reached critical mass and we realised we were no longer compatible. I hope you never experience that - perhaps you're retired and childless and won't have the complications I had - so good luck with yours!

Don't hurt him too much, especially his face. I want to use it as my throne at some point. -cosmicwitch
If I ever have a punk band with just two members, I'm calling it "Anal Pear". -kittyumbrass
Nature abhors a vacuum, so if you present us with a hole we're going to try to fill it. For nature's sake. -SoftGameHunter
My strap on is also hung like Ron Jeremy's ponysona and will totes raep your ankle. -Ingenue

Offline James Moriarty

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Re: 24/7 Control
« Reply #9 on: February 24, 2017, 12:36:17 AM »
This is something I fantasise about but doubt I would ever want in real life. It seems like a lot of responsibility and work and I would hate for something I enjoy so much to become an annoyance. I've never tried it but I have had partners who required a lot of attention and that began to annoy me.

Offline Kuriosity

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Re: 24/7 Control
« Reply #10 on: February 24, 2017, 01:21:16 PM »
Similarly this is something I might fantasize about, and when I was younger and a bit more ignorant thought I wanted, but these days I know I most definitely do not.  :smh: I love my work and my hobbies, and having to live on another's schedule would of course rather tangle all that up. I love the feeling of control being taken away when I feel safe with a person, but I think outside the home or when it involves more factors it would just be too terrifying. When I feel trapped, I immediately start to disentangle myself. Maybe that's something I could get over, but I'm honestly not sure.

And while I don't think I'd be that much work as a 24/7 sub in theory, I'd also feel sort of guilty putting that weight on my partner/dom, even if he wanted it and I did things in return, like keep house and cook, ect. I know how heavy a burden having someone else's emotional wellbeing on your shoulders is, and it's impossibly exhausting. I almost don't understand how a dom can find it worthwhile, although that's probably simply because I'm not one.  :laugh2: Anyway, no disrespect meant to those who are or want to be in 24/7 relationships. I can definitely see the appeal of it, I just don't think I could handle it myself.

Offline Arjuna

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Re: 24/7 Control
« Reply #11 on: March 07, 2017, 05:54:47 PM »
I was for about a month a 24/7 slave - and it was more as pleasant to me.
In the past I always refused the 1950's lifestyle and swore myself, that I'll never become a housewife like this...
In my first days as a 24/7 slave I figured out, that it's more then pleasing to me doing the household, cooking, serving and being always ready for my Master.
I had strict rules, was never allowed to sleep in same bed with him and following his orders, without questioning. Sometimes it was hard - really hard, but after a while I felt more and more free whith all the rules and orders.
When I was done with pleasing him or doing my chores, I also got my "freetime". Where I could do what I wanted to do - surely with Master's permission. Also during my freetime, I had to be still available for him. Usually he wanted a grilled cheese sandwich XD or other little things. :giggle:

It was not boring to me, and I'm missing this time really *sigh*

Now I'm in a long distance relationship with him, and we try to keep it up as good as possible.
I have to send text messages when I'm leaving home and what I'm going to do.
I have to schedule appointments in our shared callendar and telling him what and when I'm going to do.
I need also permission to buy new clothes/shoess and so on...
He leads my life, tells me when I have to go bed and I really enjoy it.
I can't say it's boring or too stressful.

I'm his "sexretary", slave, fucktoy and housewife and it makes me free and happy :heart:

I'm looking forward into the near future to share with him this life together, without the distance.

« Last Edit: March 07, 2017, 05:59:04 PM by Arjuna »

Offline buymebondsofsteel

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Re: 24/7 Control
« Reply #12 on: April 30, 2017, 03:38:14 AM »
I can't GET my SO to tell me what to do sometimes.
"what do you want to do"
"I literally don't fucking care please just do whatever and I will tag along."
"I'm tired of choosing what we do all the time. Why can't you choose."
"Because all I want to do is whatever you want to do!"
"I'm not fucking picking what we do. You have to pick something."
 :facepalm2: Idk why this is so hard for him to comprehend.
On the flip side, I can't seem to do anything he wants me to do. I don't clean right or often enough, I don't cook enough, I'm not social enough with visitors, I work too much, I baby the damn dog too much...
I would love to be a stay at home wife sub, if I'm by myself while you work all day and you tell me what you want to eat and what you want to do this evening/this weekend. I will happily entertain myself when you want to do something else if I need to. Oh you want to watch the UFC match? Great lemme get a book and snuggle up. You wanna go to the movies? I'll drop that book so fast it falls under the couch. Wanna work on your car? I have a stool, let me hand you tools. Go inside and leave you alone? Great too I have some gardening to do or some shit. You want to leave me bound and gagged hanging from the living room ceiling til you get home from work? Yeah I'll go get the ropes.
So, idk, does that put me somewhwere in the middle? Like, don't tell me how to think or what to do, but when you want something or you want to go somewhere I'm all over it.
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Offline Carlosdevil

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Re: 24/7 Control
« Reply #13 on: April 30, 2017, 12:36:16 PM »
Having that much control over someone's life - making every single decision for them - is taxing. I understand the need to have your life set out for you, where to go, what to wear, how to act but keep in mind that if you're deciding what to eat for dinner every night, where you go every time you walk out of the door, it adds up. Keep in mind too that even doms get tired and don't want to make any decisions. It's only human. "I don't know where I want to go out for dinner, where would you like to go?" is not necessarily an abrogation of his responsibilities as a dom but may just be a statement "I'm exhausted, I can't think but I'm hungry, why don't you help me out and pick a place. I just can't do it." I get there in real life and I'm not even a dom.

In other words, it might not be that your SO doesn't comprehend; it might be he's just tired. Then again, the fact that he's so critical of the things that you do is NOT a very good sign, particularly if you're working a full time job and keeping up a household. In fantasyland, I wouldn't mind a wife like you at all. In reality, I need someone who will pick up the slack for me when I'm not up to snuff. I hope you find what you need.
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Offline RayPistonprowl

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Re: 24/7 Control
« Reply #14 on: May 01, 2017, 11:36:10 AM »
On the flip side, I can't seem to do anything he wants me to do. I don't clean right or often enough, I don't cook enough, I'm not social enough with visitors, I work too much, I baby the damn dog too much...

That doesn't sound like a healthy relationship, [member=2139]buymebondsofsteel[/member] . I think your troubles there go deeper than him simply not listening to you. :/

Don't hurt him too much, especially his face. I want to use it as my throne at some point. -cosmicwitch
If I ever have a punk band with just two members, I'm calling it "Anal Pear". -kittyumbrass
Nature abhors a vacuum, so if you present us with a hole we're going to try to fill it. For nature's sake. -SoftGameHunter
My strap on is also hung like Ron Jeremy's ponysona and will totes raep your ankle. -Ingenue

 

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